My
quilt is not a show quilt, not like those that resemble a painting, where
every thin strip of fabric is a brush stroke shading into the next color. It's
not one with an intricate pattern with names like Dresden plate or prairie star
or cathedral window. Simple green and pink butterflies are appliqued on off-white
cotton. The stitching is not perfect, the original colors have faded, the edges
are worn, and the very thin lining is leaking out.
Yet I love it because my mother made it for
me. I don't remember her making it. It seems it was always there in my room. I
imagine it was in my crib before I graduated to the old spool bed that had been
my father's, and which, years later, I am still sleeping in. I do remember being
wrapped up in it as she or my father read to me at bedtime, cuddling with it
and my cat Patsy on the old red sofa, and dragging it with me from room to
room. So when it was finally consigned to the cedar chest, it had been worn
thin with love.
I wonder now about my mother's decision to
make this quilt. I know she and my father were overjoyed when I was born, not
just as any parent would be, but because two years earlier she had carried a
baby to full term only to lose her--the older sister Carolyn whom I would never
know. Was she making this quilt while awaiting my arrival? Was it an activity
to keep her from worrying about another tiny coffin? Or did she make it after I
arrived sewing these tiny butterflies in a spirit of celebration.
Whenever she made it, I am glad she chose
butterflies for the theme. I have always loved butterflies--their magnificent
colors, their emerging from the cocoon, the story of their migration--all of
that. Or maybe it is memories of being surrounded by them in the arms of my
mother.
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